Mediocre people do extraordinary things all the time.

Low on fuel

My breath gets caught in my throat and my heartstrings rip
every time I run into someone new with your name. It's a trip
down memory lane I'm not quite willing to make yet.

College life is fair. I've taken up smoking again. I'm not sure I care
anymore. As things go on life brings the worst out of me. I chalk
this up to past mistakes and lessons learned. Anymore, sitting in
a group of people reminds me of better days. These people aren't
quite the same but I know my old friends are just around the corner.
If only I could turn fast enough.

Sometimes I try trading hugs for cigarettes. Really though, I just want
a hug. I need to feel cared about. I know I don't mean an ounce to
anyone here and I'm learning to deal with it.

Dependability is something that's not innate. I can't depend upon
myself let alone anyone else.

I'm counting these days like bond money.

Are you still there?

Lately I've been so busy with swallowing my insecurities I forget about you, which is nice.
I don't have you pounding around on the insides of my brains.

I'm not sure if I like this new development.
I miss you. I want to take you in my arms. I'm so lonely but I'm starting to realize I don't need anyone but myself. Your ship has left harbor and sailed out.
There's no use waiting for something that's not going to come. So I cut these ties and I shred those memories.

RIP